Let us practice the I-am meditation.

This is the reason why the smart person, the wise person begins to pursue spiritual life even when things are going well. They do not wait until something goes wrong.

 They start to feel that life is more meaningful then they can ever imagine and when they start to search within themselves. All the answers are within themselves. Not without, not in the world for remember the world is not real as it appears. So when you search for something in the world it'll fool you. You want to search for reality. How do we do this? How to search for reality? 

We begin to search for reality by keeping quiet. By becoming still. By quieting the mind. By making our life simple. By not getting involved in too many things in this world. We begin to slow down our activities. So we have more time to be with ourselves. We look for moments of solitude. When the TV isn't playing, when the radio isn't playing, when the phone is not ringing, we're not talking to friends or neighbors you enjoy those mo- ments more and more and more and you fond happiness in those moments. Real happi- ness. Happiness that comes from within, from reality. Not the happiness that is fleeting that is here today and gone tomorrow. But true happiness, it is everlasting. Unalloyed happiness which never changes.
Because we can begin to search for these things something in us, you can call it God's grace may lead you to the right book or to the right teacher or to the right environ- ment where we will be able to go further. Where we get to the point where nothing can disturb us any longer. Whether there is conflict in the family, problems at work, cataclysms in the world, we no longer react to these things. We just watch and we leave them alone.
You acquire a feeling of invincibility you're invincible. A feeling of being alive forever and ever and nothing can ever hurt you or destroy you. You've always been, you'll always be. You sort of feel this. And from then on you're always happy and peaceful and nothing can ever bother you again. You have done this to yourself. Nobody can do it for you.
I have summarized the whole thing for you but actually you go through many experiences before you get to that state. You go through many doubts apprehensions, suspicions. Many times in spiritual life you want to chuck the whole thing out, you want to throw it away. You feel it's not working for you. You think it's a lie it doesn't exist there is no spiritual life, everyones gone through this stage. It's called the dark night of the soul. When you feel like committing suicide. You feel so terrible. All the dark forces attack you from all directions. And you want to chuck it all out, throw it all away, forget about it. But as you hold on to something within in reality, a spark of light the darkness will ultimately leave you and again you will find peace. Again you will find harmony. And again some- thing may happen to you. You may develop cancer, AIDS. You may have to go into bankruptcy. So again you say to yourself, "If this is what spiritual life is all about I don't want it at all. I don't need this." You say this because you do not know what is happening.
In order for you to grow and become your real self all of the stuff that has been inside of you has to be totally transcended. All the stuff that is in us and we have alot of stuff in us. There is stuff completely to the top. There is stuff of images, beliefs, concepts, dogma, fears doubts, suspicions this is our stuffing. In order to empty yourself it may appear that you're getting worse. The fears multiply themselves. The doubts become more terrible than they've ever been before. This is the change that is coming into your life.
In other words if you want self-realization you've got to get rid of everything. Everything that you've been holding onto. 

Everything that you've been holding onto, everything. I mean give it up mentally. If things happen physically you just don't react to it. 

But mentally you give up all the stuff that has been bothering you for all these years. 

You surrender everything to God. Empty yourself out completely, totally. Again you do this by not reacting to anything. Not allowing the world to get to you, show you anything. You keep holding on and holding on. Holding on to nothing. 

Becoming nothing more and more. No longer worrying.
Then all of a sudden you see a light inside of you. The light brings you untold happiness and peace. The light grows steadily. The lights in your heart. The light of a thousand suns. To give everything up to this light. You're no longer afraid. You are free. 

Many of you can feel this freedom now. How wonderful it feels. Another name for this freedom is stillness, quietness, silence. 

As long as the mind is active and you're think- ing and thinking you can never understand the deep silence of freedom. But you learn not to think. Not to analyze anything or to figure anything out. You are perfect just the way you are. You are no longer alone. You begin to feel the whole universe emanating out of you. Creation emanates out of your mind. All the creation that you see comes out of your self. Yo have discovered that you are the creator. You are the self, the absolute reality, nirvana, the absolute oneness. Nothing else can exist for you. 

All is well. There are no mistakes. The world is Brahman and has always been self. You are that!
There never was a world and you. The universe the world is inside of you. You are all-pervading, absolute reality, everywhere present. You are I-am. I-am-that-I-am. 

Let us practice the I-am meditation. 
Close your eyes and focus your attention on your breath.
 Become aware of your respiration.
 Become the witness to your breath.

 Breath naturally and normally. 
Ask yourself, "Who is this witness? Who observes the breath?" And the answer comes, "I am." WIth your respiration inhale and say, "I," exhale say, "am." In- hale and say, "I," exhale and say, "am."

With every breath, with every I-am feel yourself going deeper and deeper within. 
Allow your body to dissolve completely where only I-am exists and nothing else.
Sri Robert Adams tr 192 10-18-92